skyrim is a bad game because i cant hug my friends or my husband. maybe i want to let the people in my life know i appreciate them dearly even if they just have three lines of base dialogue
and before one of you says something like “oh why dont you just play stardew valley or animal crossing or some other game where you get to be nice to people” please understand that i enjoy hunting the city guards for sport but that doesnt mean that im not full of love
skyrim remaster with tiddie jiggle physics but because bethesda’s game engine is so wack they have to incorporate it into the game by inserting a very small unique npc within each each tiddie who jumps at scripted intervals.
can cause a glitch where the player characters tiddies become hostile
[“Never should have come here!” muffled by layers of clothing]
Me, a humble draugr, quietly minding my own business in my barrow tomb, doing my daily chores (lighting the candles, taking the frostbite spider for a walk, making the large swinging axes swing in the corridor of large swinging axes), having a sleepover with the lads in the deathlord’s chamber
YOU, loud, alive, obnoxious, barging into our tomb eating an entire wheel of cheese, making a mess, plundering my life savings from my burial urn, setting fire to frosty (the frostbite spider), re-killing me and the lads, WAKING the deathlord
For some reason my brain can’t reconcile that this song exists outside of the game. Every note of this is branded on my subconscious. I’ve listened to this song more than I’ve listened to my own voice and yet it still manages to calm my body better than an anesthetic. I’m astral projecting - my thumbs are typing but my soul is playing Skyrim.
